The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free. In love, you feel the most alive when your partner is patient and never willing to give up on you. You'd like to your lover to think you are loyal and faithful... that you'll never change. You would be forced to break up with someone who was insecure and in constant need of reassurance. Your ideal relationship is open. Both of you can talk about everything... no secrets. Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment. You think of marriage pessimistically. You don't think happy marriages exist anymore. In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You'll do anything for love, but you won't fall for it easily.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

evil spot

i
am
pissed
off.

Very Displeased in fact. I dont understand how mothers coud keep protecting their children. They should leave them alone, let them live their lives and maybe give a little advice. But all they do, or at least mine does, is rub it in. Well, thanks but NO they didnt make things ANY better.

ROARRRRRRR.

ugh.
seething with anger.

if there's a reason

today, the security guard at Crown Hotel @Orchard thought i was a rock singer. well, it could be because of the "keep rockin ax!" shirt that i wore. but still, SINGER? i thanked him for the compliment though.

in other news, work's been a okay except a few hiccups and different characters. i hate it most when people have mood swings. i definitely acknowledge it is a part of human nature, but it irks me when people are double standards about professionalism.

also, i think i should just tell the chefs i'm attached/not straight. everyday i get random nonsense from them. if it isnt about my dressing, its about my behavior. is working in the kitchen thattt boring? owell, lets add a little desperation too.

listening to enya makes me sleep. but from another perspective, her tones and melodies create a placid ambience - conducive for me to sleep.

zzzz.

and good news! i have my day off tmrw (thurs) and friday! :) now is the only time i get to paint the town red, enjoy random rubbish from Orchard and also lose weight to fit into that rather sluty looking, cigar girl tube dress. Beautiful.

Oh and if anyone is interested at all:

Raffles Hotel's New Year's Eve Gala Ball is one of the most anticipated events on the local social calendar. (i think $495 is quite an anticipation).

Be enthralled by these...

- exceptional wines at Raffles Grill BY JACQUES & LAURENT POURCEL and Tiffin Room.
- a live band and dancing in the main lobby
- astounding tap dancing moves and absorbing renditions of famous Broadway musicals by award-winning performers Wayne Scott Kermond, Danielle Barnes and their talented dancers.
- rave reviews by Good Morning Australia, The Sydney Morning Herald, Australian Newspaper and The Daily Telegraph Sydney, Wayne and his brilliant cast will rouse the crowd to a climatic moment as the midnight hour draws near, where a spectacular balloon drop will usher in the New Year in grand style.

For reservations and enquiries, please call Dining Reservation at 6331 1612 or 6431 6156. Alternatively, please email dining@raffles.com.

I'm impressed myself. So please attend and you'll also get the bonus of letting me offer you cigars. See you there.

counting the days

you, standing by the sideway line.

DOES ANYONE HAVE GRAYS ANATOMY'S EP 7 ONWARDS? I've watched till ep 6 and still loving it. (: SO IF YOU DO, PLS LET ME KNOW.

6 hours of sleep,
a manager with mood swings worse than a girl's,
no dinner,

makes it difficult for me to be pen down my reflective thoughts I've noted the entire day.

yawn.

Lock Stock and Barrel

I went to that bar.

tired
sleepy
dehydrated
left with little voice
smelling of smoke

my eyes are closing
shutting
shut.

i should shower.

having lots to mention, but am a lil too off for that.

another time; as there always will be a chance. :) i hope muraly understands. (:

Pain comes in many forms

see this tiny picture? i had no idea alam got the cigar girl idea OFF GOOGLE. what the fellinflangs. 0_O.

i give you the permission to laugh. then imagine me in this. short tube like dress. with fish net stockings. right. i hear new year's eve is about..5 days away. God, save me.

Jo: I'll be back on the 16 or 17th of Feb. Do add me on MSN. its ihearnothing@hotmail.com

AND TODAY is christmas. SO...

SEASONS GREETINGS! :D

nothing big on my side of the island... but it will be tmrw night after i get OFF WORK.

Damn right. I go to work tmrw. Whyyyyyyyyyyyy.

Which reminds me. I need to write my little notes for the entire crew. But before that, I need to save someone's trainwreck.

Its hard to accept the end when you're too close
Sometimes you're tired and scared
but denying it isnt going to change the truth
sonner or later
we have to put aside our denial, head on, guns blazing
keeping afloat; not drowning in denial

that trail of decadence

I'm back, as always.

Repetition is something I am all too familiar with. So lets just repeat what I spoke to my mum and dad about - work today.

We saw a few celebs (for reasons I cant mention who), and like I always do, I met all these people with great personalities. This guy gave me suggestions on how to live my life, others tell me things they forsee in the future...Oh well, time will tell, wont it?

My point, really, is that the managers arent too happy about me having their so-called "chit chat sessions". What can I say, its service which ultimately brings people back..so they can go figure. Cos as far as I am concerned, I'm going to unnecessary extra mile for a place I'm working with for less than a month more.

Nonetheless, I decided that I shouldnt adopt the adamant stance and lack the initiaitive. Gee, its only, what, another 23 more days. TWENTY THREE MORE DAYS! wheeeeeee.

Thanks for your concern, but i'm not deranged yet. ahh, yet is the key word.

Should I go to work tomorrow? They asked me to go back despite it being my off day. I reckon Christmas will be dang fun with them :) The entire crew working our butts off together.

I wonder why
the sun hangs to high
to distrubute us light
too much heat to fight.

Bad poetry, but HEY MAN, i'm trying. You havent head Andrea Munnie Ponds try to rhyme.

itzzy bitzee yellow pinky polka dotta tenny weeny.

We should be thankful for the little things in life. Because when unexpected traumas and incidents smack you in between the eye, things may not be as smooth sailing as we anticipate them to be.

I say all this in such a philosophical manner, but my point, really, is - count your blessings. When the worst things happen, and you dont have the time or focus to consider as reality sinks in, all you live on is prayer. Prayers you held for so long which imagined were never going to come true. I'm thankful for everything. That eddie wasnt in the accident. That his mum is now safe and sound. That from a potentially deadly accident, everything's still in one piece (not the car, of course).

I'm so thankful, I sound like Adam Sandler in Anger Management. HAHA. Right. Self Amusement at its highest degree.

Anyway, I wanted to pen down my year gone by, as I gave it some thought in the shower (unnecessary info, i know). Then I realised, like most people, I can quite condense the 365...okay fine...310 odd days which have come and gone. I recall how Trinity whizzed by us, and Uni hit like a tight slap in the face.

Then, of course was so thankful to get in, not realising that life couldnt get worse. Since then, though, the year 2005 has taught me unforgettable lessons that I will take with me for the rest of my life. Ever so grateful, I am. :)

I dont wish to worry about the remaining days of this year, for Christmas IS the time for miracles to happen. I am so naive, I know. But as all things are, I shall leave it be and maybe the best arise. We'll see. One of the worst feelings I've had was to jinx yourself.

On a totally unrelated note, I've come to realise I talk a lot. Too much. I'm sure my dad still firmly believes my mouth will get me into trouble. It has, but only with him. Interestingly, I hold rather entertaining conversations with people. Like today, I was chatting with this guy called Blaze (what a damn cool name) who studied in McGill. Awesome stuff. He tipped me 10 bucks. (which I never get to keep,whether he gave me a million or not). Work's good in that sense.

Which reminds me, I think I spend way too much meeting up for coffee.

but I wont be silly since friendships are definitely not measured per cuppa coffee/tea/mocha or what have you (reminds me of mrs TIAN! anyone recall she always says that?).

Which brings me to my other point.

Anon (aka jo hong): Lets meet up sometime when we both get back to melbourne, yeah? how did you find my blog? Have a good break and merry christmas!

So I leave you with this very lengthy post. Thanks for readings till the end.

And if i don't write something here or dont get to see you before christmas.

HAVE YOURSELF MERRY LITTLE CHRISTMAS EVERYONE! :)

ALSO, in the up coming agenda...

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN IN SINAGPORE.
MAE IS COMING DOWN! (and possibly EDDIE)

(not a celeb, but impt enough for me :D)
28th-30th DECEMBER

I.

AM.

OVER.

THAT ROUND HANGING MOON!

DARLING, CANT WAIT, ABCOLUTELY CANT WAIT.
I DONT KNOW WHY I AM TYPING IN CAPS.
WHATEVER IT IS, GET YOUR BUTT

RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW SWEETIE ! :D

p.s she's in love with the MSN voice thingy. insane but.
but its not gonna stop me from loving her this much. :)

Amarantime

Everything's good, except for the 2 hour cold war I had with Jeremy. Handling a little boy, who is silly and fun loving makes it difficult to manage a cold war. :) That said, I spent a good 4 hours of my day getting pissed off and questioning why I was maligned.

Yesterday was probably my most angsty day this holidays, but I'm glad Jeremy and I settled things and we're now closer friends. He's a sweet boy, who is secretly in love with cheesy songs (arent we all?). I still think he needs to grow up.

Ironically, we communicate well non-verbally.

Enya's new CD is awesome. It lets you drift off into another world.

Speaking of music, entertainment...etc, anyone hasnt caught PROMISE? Muraly told me its pretty good. HMN. You know what to do...CALL!

This is random.

I just ate an entire packet of ...japanese biscuits.

And they're taking measurements for the dress today! Oh, wonderful.

Am i rambling? i think I'm rambling.

rah
rahhhh
ramble.
bubble
oh
so
subtle.

o_O

one last shot

its hard to accept the end when you're too close.

Because I am Bored/

Your Brain's Pattern

You have a dreamy mind, full of fancy and fantasy.You have the ability to stay forever entertained with your thoughts.People may say you're hard to read, but that's because you're so internally focused.But when you do share what you're thinking, people are impressed with your imagination.

What Pattern Is Your Brain?

Degrees of Truth

Your Heart Is Blue

Love is a doing word for you. You know it's love when you treat each other well.You are a giving lover, but you don't give too much. You expect something in return. Your flirting style: Friendly Your lucky first date: Lunch at an outdoor cafe Your dream lover: Is both generous and selfish What you bring to relationships: Loyalty

What Color Heart Do You Have?

blogspot mocks me in a simple way.

just delete my entry like THIS.

i will tell you more later.

THIS SYSTEM pissed me off.

RAH.

Whats your Flavour

I'd be more innovative with the title, but I admit i'm drowing myself with water. This, I do, as an attempt to make myself less drunk. But its my own doing. I chose to skull 2 glasses of wine.

Skulling One glass of wine on a rather empty stomach gets to me easily. Dang! My dear old liver aint working as efficiently as it should be.

Working from 11-11 can kill me. Like it is now. But hey man, I cant tell you how much working this bunch is. SO super fun. :) I'm gonna miss them so so much when I leave after New Years. I feel funny tmrw cos I'm on leave. This means I dont see the familiar faces I see everyday! Velu (the ever caring one), Muraly (my sure cure laughing pill, no joke) , Jeremy (Gosh, he's idiotic but i still love him), crystal! (sweet la), sharyn (the new comer) and so many more la.

Why wasnt my holiday longer. I can tell, I'm really gonna miss them THAT much.

Sigh, I get attached to things so easily. It makes it so hard to let go, you know?

So anyway, today 3 of my guy friends were depressed. Thats what, may i dare say, SNAGS. Sensitive New Age Guys. But most intruiging was the chat with Muraly last afternoon. (it IS past 12, so..) He mentioned how supressing all his agony was the surest track to implosion.

So he had a smoke, spoke to me, and let it all out of his system.

Out it went, together with the smoke. But I'm glad I spoke to him. And I'm even more satisfied that today, I made him joke, smile and even laugh. He may never ever read this, but one day, I hope all his issues settle and the old Muraly will surface.

I am naive. I think this world, with all my tender loving and boundless concern, will somehow change one. That, what I do willl make a wrong right. But let me acknowledge that I cant. That even if I gave Muraly the biscuits and distracted him from his problem, he still faces them at the end of the day. I firmly believe that, even if i cant solve the issue, lets help to make it a little less painful and heart wrenching for him.

Enough of the sad issues.

Today, I made loads of friends! The close to midnight friend was the most interesting one! :D okay, i'll tell you more next time.

I'm happy with what I'm doing. Very very pleased.

i'm gonna hit the sack soon.

And from the bottom of my heart, I hope those of you who have problems, approach me with an open heart. I cant promise to solve the issue, but I hereby promise my patience and whole heartedness to you.

Till then, remember that someone loves you. And among the huge circle, there's me :)

Lots of Love.

&$&^%&Q)

Deal with that title because I just have too many profanities to use, one isnt going to do any of them justice.

I feel
- hungry
- tired
- exhuasted
- burnt out
- harrassed
- hungry. wait. i said that already.

Okay, not lucid anymore. becuase i worked from 11-11 today. I had a 3 hour break from 3-6 so i met Eels @ Menottis. Its a rather good Italian Restaurant. Their Mocha is pretty damn good! :D
We...laughed at photos we took. They're pretty good actually! Someone get me an SLR camera for christmas, thanks.

Alternatively, an Ipod Nano would be good too. Thanks in advance.

I'm changing my shifts. I cant do this thrice week. I'd DIE. Why?

When you end at 11, you get out my 11.30. Meaning, you cant get a cab. Because it just a sad and unfortunate situation that the entire working world decides they need to reach home close to midnight! Dang, everyone's conscientoius. Okay, I dont give two hoots, actually.

Mae just asked me how much i get. I'm so tired, i said 600 a week. oh God. that should my cue to sleep and get up late late late tmrw.

BUT NO.

I work from 1-9 tmrw.
Mon- 11-11 (free from 3-6)
Tues - same
Wed - 9 to 5 (OMG. phew)
Thurs 11-11 (free from 3-6)
you know fridays.

*&%!^^#*(*#)#**&@^#*^!@$)&*(*!$*&.

okay, enough. i'm tired of whining and bemoaning.

yawn.

Tell me what happens when.. your senior captain perves on you like this:

1. "hi charrrrrrrrrrrrrrmaineeee..."
2. " i had to name the moon after a girl, I'll call it Charmaine....."
3. "you know, you're one of the most lovely girls"
4. "i could call your name every second of the day.."
5. "yes darling, how can i help you"
6. "omg, she touched me! i'm so happy"
7. "aiya, she never talk to me, i thought she was referring to me"

he's...

1. NOT SEEN ENOUGH GIRLS.
2. NOT SEEN ENOUGH GIRLS
3. NOT SEEN ENOUGH GIRLS.
4. EXTREMELY DEPRIVED.

and to guys reading this, pls dont ever whistle at a girl who looks decent in a skirt. cos its a big insult to her. wanna flirt, clubs and bars all along orchard road. thanks, save bras basah for the Guai Lous going to Raffles and those who actually work there. Much appreciated.

I can complain for pages on end. Because girls like me, like to talk.

but i'll shut up. if you really wanna know what all this is about,

visit me @ Seah Street Deli, Raffles Hotel.

And becuase I know Singaporeans are great in road sense, i'm giving you early warning that this place, is @ the junction of Seah Street and North Bridge Road. Unless you think you've got fantastic geographical sense like CHENG SHU YAR, ask me first before you come. my no. is 96772880. now you know the contact, please dont tell me i never gave you my number.

In the midst of this angsty, cynical and so very bitchy entry, i wanna wish my DARLING SHU YAR A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

I hope you liked your bday celebration at the Night Safari hun. :) Have a Grrreat time @ Egypt. and bring something hoome for your dear char. Love you lots. 6 years and counting. I say cheers to such great friendship babe. Love you and lots and lots and lots! :D

lastly,

COME TO SEAH STREET DELI. :D

Of aches and pains.

haha, nope. not heartache. :)
thanks babes, for all the lovin.
but really, i'm good. all's cool
at least my side of the court's pretty clear.

i'm not majorly depressed or anything. so worry not ma girls!

nonetheless, coffee/dinner/supper with anyone is always welcome. so dear girls/guys just call ogay?

i'm on MC today and tmrw cos of my ankle. there's this theory that you learn through problems. well, today i realised i'm mildy flat footed. gee, was pretty worried but doc said its a small degree. heng.

so, there. no wonder my NAPFA forever B la. cheh. okay, who am i kidding. i can't run. period.

it is definitely strange how i miss standing at the pantry making signature shakes and drinks. there's one less day meeting and greeting celebs and oh-so-hot people. haha. this has confirmed that i work much better well under pressure. dang! i should've done medicine so i can take ER shifs.

right, just imagine Dr Charmaine Yee. :) okay, stop dreaming.

SO BASICALLY,

i'm supposed to have minimal leg movement over the next few days. but being the hyperactive person i am, i'm going out with people. what you need to do right now? is pick up your phone or mobile to SMS or call me.

OH, and eddie's coming down! :D fun fun fun! i really appreciate that no matter how stressed, upset or happy i am, there's this goondoo to share it with. i mean, among others like the CUPO, J, li, char and many more i guess.

thanks muchie to edwin tan biao jie.

ouch.
my ankle hurts.
oh and the doc gave me the 2nd most deadly painkiller in the world.
whatever was he thinking?

my foot's in pain but at least my brain's functioning well.

I Just Dont Love you No More

For all the years that I’ve known you baby
I can’t figure out the reason why lately
you’ve been acting so cold

didn’t you say
if there’s a problem we should work it out
so why you giving me the cold shoulder now
like you don’t want to talk to me girl tell me
okay I know I was late again
I made you mad and dinners thrown in

the bin
but why you making this thing drag on so long

I wanna know
I’m sick and tired of this silly game
don’t think that I’m the only one here to blame
it’s not me who’s been going round slamming doors

That’s when you turned and said to me
I don’t care babe who’s right or wrong
I just don’t love you no more

Rain outside my window pouring down
what now, you’re gone, my fault, I’m sorry
feeling like a fool cos I let you down
now it’s too late to turn it around
I’m sorry for the tears I’ve made you cry
I guess this time it really is goodbye
you made it clear when you said
I just don’t love you no more

I know that I’ve made a few mistakes
but never thought things would turn out this way
doesn’t make sense to me now that you’re gone

(I see it all so clearly)
me at the door with you in a state
giving my reasons but as you look away
I can see a tear roll down your face
That’s when you turned and said to me
I don’t care babe who’s right or wrong
I just don’t love you no more

Rain outside my window pouring down
what now, you’re gone, my fault, I’m sorry
feeling like a fool cos I let you down
now it’s too late to turn it around
I’m sorry for the tears I’ve made you cry
I guess this time it really is goodbye
you made it clear when you said
I just don’t love you no more

Those simple words hit so hard
they turned my whole world upside down
girl you caught me completely off guard
on that night you said to me
I just don’t love you no more

Rain outside my window pouring down
what now, you’re gone, my fault, I’m sorry
feeling like a fool cos I let you down
now it’s too late to turn it around
I’m sorry for the tears I’ve made you cry
I guess this time it really is goodbye

You made it clear when you said
I just don’t love you no more

-

just so its out my system,

we

(no questions asked, cos you know him)

are

friends.

nothing more.

period.

only song lyrics highlighted in blue are revelant.

show me your profile

The little pups at the back alley are barking. I like their barkings cos when you listen to them, its got this little playful jingle to it.

okay, i'm losing it. who talks about puppies barking? -_-

maybe its because i've bene hung up for too long.

way.
too.
long.

i cant keep waiting for you
you might be hesistating but
i'll find my way
you'll wake up some day; but it'll be too late

we had our moments

who's going to complete my world?
its just some random line from a song.

sigh.
double sigh.

tonight's been a lot of talk about the end of one relationship. i have lots to say, but to pen it here would not be doing it justice. whether he will be reading this or not, i'm clueless.

speaking of which, i've been either blissfulyl ignorant and possibly lost about many things which have happened.

and today, i made someone happy, but disappointed so many more.

oh and just when i wanna have a break from this world, like walk by some serene river, i begin work tmrw.

b-e-a-u tiful.

i want the weekend to come. because i know i will be occupied and all the past 2 and a half week's of thinking would stop - just for a while.

dinner dates anyone? raffles city would be goooood :)

much love.